24,267!!!

And so it begins! Today is the start of what many consider the greatest sporting event our country has to offer, March Madness! Since I'll be at work all day I won't have access to a TV... but I will have March Madness on Demand thanks to cbssports.com!

This little invention allows me and I'm sure countless others to waste away their Thursday and Friday work days watching college basketball when we're supposed to be doing work. I've always heard that the first Thursday and Friday of March Madness is one of the biggest drops in work production in businesses around the US every year... sitting at my desk with MMOD on my desktop, I can now see why. Currently I sit at 24,267 in line to get my ticket for all the digital goodness CBS can offer! I'm pumped, and why shouldn't I be? I'm getting paid to watch college basketball!

Excited about watching some good old roundball yet? I know I am! So get to it!

But, if you've read this far, I've only got one question for you and that is why are you reading this blog when you should be watching basketball?

March Madness > A Square Guy.... book it.

Hank Steinbrenner says something stupid; the sky is blue

In the "what else is new?" section of sports news, it seems that Yanks boss Hank Steinbrenner has opened his mouth, and once again, nonsense has coming flying out. This time ole Hank wants to cut revenue sharing to any team that competes, or plays rough with his Yanks. He's joking right? According to this quote he's not....

"I don't want these teams in general to forget who subsidizes a lot of them, and it's the Yankees, the Red Sox, Dodgers, Mets," he said to The New York Post. "I would prefer if teams want to target the Yankees that they at least start giving some of that revenue sharing and luxury tax money back. From an owner's point of view, that's my point."

- Village Idiot

Sorry Hank, but that's not how the MLB works. Believe it or not, teams are paid to try and win... they're not paid to cater to you and your fans wishes...

Everyday this guy just says something dumber and dumber... Personally, I can't wait till this guy drops his next "pearls" of wisdom on the waiting public.

Oh wait, yes I can.

Don't compete against us bro!

Little girl does a killer James Lipton impersonation

While cruising Will Ferrel's site late last night I came across a hilarious video of a little girl doing an "interview" with Al Pacino as if she was Inside the Actors Studio's own James Lipton. This girl is spot on... she has the hokey facial expressions, the mannerisms and even the obviously doctored black beard. Heck her "beard" may be more authentic than Lipton's.

So check out this great performance... between this video and Pearl McKay as "The Landlord" Ferrell and his audience seem to have a knack of finding young talent and putting it on display for the world to see.

You'd be doing yourself a disservice if you don't check this great video out. It's worth a laugh at least... and in today's world, who couldn't use one of those?

The Biggest Whiner

The Biggest Loser is a must see show in the Lint household each week... unfortunately as time has gone on the show has changed from being more about the triumphs of the contestants to the bitchiness of all the female contestants and how the show has turned against them.

Note to all the women on the show... no one likes a whiner, especially a pleasantly plump one.

Get your ass in gear and shut your mouth... in front of the cameras and at the dinner table!

Simple right? So get to it already!

Gnarls Barkley "Run" video banned from MTV

Word going around the net is that the latest Gnarls Barkley video "Run" has been banned by MTV and it's not because of the video's content. MTV banning a video? What year are we in again? And what exactly could cause a video to be banned when it has nothing to do with content? Apparently the Gnarls Barkley/Justin Timberlake collaboration has the potential to induce seizures in some people due to the strobe like effects running rampant through the video. No word yet on what if any fixes will be made so that the video can hit the airwaves, but I have to imagine that anything featuring Justin Timberlake won't stay "banned" for long on MTV.

To get prospective on the news, I called up Japan. Yes the country. They offered no comment and claimed to not have a clue about this so called "seizure gate". Sadly our interview was cut short after the person went into epileptic shock after turning on the TV. Go figure.

But fear not loyal readers, I have procured the dangerous footage and am prepared to share it with you... ready?




So there you have it. If it induces seizures don’t blame me; blame Gnarls, or Japan. Pick your poison… it’s all deadly (literally).

Friday Night Lights lives.... Maybe.

Hey there sports fans, cruising the net I found some great news about a little show called "Friday Night Lights"... and it's positive news! FNL MAY be returning for Season 3 afterall! That's right, the little show that could seems to be getting new life in a pending deal between NBC and DirecTV. Basically NBC will agree to air FNL on NBC and a specific DirecTV only channel, in exchange, we the fans get another season! Great news indeed!

"What in the wide wide world of sports is going on here?"

Another day and it seems another UVA football player making headlines for the wrong reasons. This time it is redshirt junior DB Mike Brown (or as my brother and I liked to call him "Lil Wayne"). Brown was busted on larceny and other assorted charges over this past weekend. With his departure from the team a near certainty, UVA has now lost four starters to suspension this off season alone! QB Jameel Sewell, CB's, Chris Cook and Mike Brown, and DE Jeffery Fitzgerald. Factor in the graduation of All World DE Chris Long, and starting DT Allen Billyk as well as OLB Jermaine Dias and Safeties Nate Lyles and Jamall Jackson and UVA looks like it will be hurting this year. Not to mention 3/5 starting linemen are gone as well as our two top TE's and its easy to see Al Groh has a hell of a challenge ahead of him... Good luck big man.

What exactly is in the water up in The Hook? We used to be a very clean program... now it seems we have become Virginia Tech, without the success.

Oh yeah, here's the link to Brown's arrest.

http://www.dailyprogress.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=CDP/MGArticle/CDP_BasicArticle&c=MGArticle&cid=1173354831241&path

Grapes are fattening?

Grapes are fattening? According to at least one of my coworkers they are. Now I usually dismiss idle office chatter but this little nugget caught my ear. Where in the world did someone hear grapes of all things were fattening? If I'm not mistaken, I'm pretty sure grapes are 75% or more water. Sure all fruits contain a good amount of sugar but in my opinion nothing that comes from God's green earth is going to be that unhealthy for you... especially when it's a fruit!!! I'd also like to point out the woman who made this comment smokes two packs of cigarettes a day! Yet grapes are too fattening to eat? Unbelievable.

Priorities, people.

Technology is not my friend...

For my inaugural blog I thought I'd introduce everyone to my little slice of the working world. Currently I am a reporter for a weekly newspaper that reaches over 28,000 people. Being a community newspaper, we are not staffed as well as, say, a daily or a monthly magazine... that means in addition to my normal writing/reporting duties, I also have to lay out (put the paper together for print) about 30 pages weekly. Starting at 9 in the morning this job is not usually complete till about 5 in the afternoon... and that's a non stop process. Thankfully once all the heavy lifting has been done on our part, we send the paper off to the printers and get it back early the next morning. So imagine my surprise this morning when I open up the paper today to notice that on the page with my biggest headline the font is totally haywire and extremely unprofessional looking.

Obviously thinking I must have made a mistake in the layout yesterday I went back and checked... to my surprise, I actually had not made any mistakes on the proof or the PDF I sent to the printer... So we come to find out that the printer actually had many mistakes this week... but the question is how?!? We send them the PDF and they simply print it... how hard can it be?

It's not easy being a weekly paper, it’s even harder when you have incompetent associates. Thankfully our agreement end with this publisher next week and we move downtown to print with the big boys...

Just for comparisson's sake, here are the two copies... the one on top is the PDF I sent to the printer... the one on the bottom is what they sent us in return.

What a sham.